The Bond We Can't Break
by soulgusttheguardian
Summary: Parabatai were supossed to be closer then brothers. But not this close, and Alec desperately wished he could set his feelings back several steps. Especially now, because he had been hurt more than he had thought Jace would ever hurt him. {Jalec one shot. Malec, and Clace. Slight spoilers. I honestly don't know.}


This story contains very mild spoilers.

I haven't read all of the first book (EDIT: when I typed this I hadn't but I have now. Doesn't really change much though..) but I saw the movie yesterday (EDIT: Wednesday) (opening show yeah) and I kept thinking 'NO. YOU MAY NOT SHIP JACE AND ALEC.' but the lack of Malec moments (my sister said they left out alot?) And the fact that Alec did actually like Jace made me go 'eh it is half canon. What the hell.' And then somehow this happened. So yeah….. Enjoy?

* * *

"So we're related." Jace began awkwardly.

"Yup."

"…Now what?"

"Well… I know Alec is into you." Clare replied, smirking humorously.

Jace rolled his eyes. "Yeah. Okay. That won't look terrible at all. 'Hey man, my girlfriend is my sister. Wanna hook up?'"

"I thought you didn't care what people thought of you." The girl remarked. She stalked around the table to stand in front of him; arms folded across her chest and the blonde boy sneered slightly.

"I never said that. All I said is my only true love is myself."

Clary made her own noise of disbelief as she started to leave. "Well honestly, I don't think he would care. He isn't stupid enough to think the great Jace would ever love someone, let alone him." Her boots clicked on the floor and up the stairs. Jace frowned and stared off at the angel statue across the room.

* * *

Well, Clary was right. Alec didn't seem to care.

His eyes remained neutral but then he seemed to come to terms with what Jace had just said and they grew slightly with an intake of breath that was kind of endearing. The blonde boy had left then and not looked back; for he was afraid of what he had said too. His Parabatai had not looked either. He felt no curious, bewildered stares. Just waves of awe.

He tried not to look suspicious-but it seemed when one wanted to be inconspicuous you felt obvious and noticeable. So the walk to Alec's room was long; with plenty of detours and backtracks and even making a few circles when he felt Isabelle walking the same way. But finally he did make it, and it was with steady breaths that he knocked on the door.

It opened shortly after; to reveal the head of shiny, groomed hair that belonged to Alec. The boy was keeping a straight face-something Jace was glad for-but he barely nodded his head and stepped back to let Jace enter. The layout was basically the same as every other room, but Jace could smell cleaner just enough to know Alec had probably done some straightening before his arrival. The thought made him smirk slightly and he adjusted his collar cockily.

"Jace.."

The blonde turned to look over his shoulder. Alec stepped forward slowly and cleared his throat awkwardly. "You do know… What you're asking me right?"

Jace nodded. "I do understand English, Alec."

The blue eyed Nephilim scoffed, irritated. "Do you even understand what will happen to you-and to me-if this is found out?"

Again, Jace nodded. His lips turned up into a sickening smile that said he was tired of Alec's dodging. "Aren't you the one who has wanted it for years?"

Alec flushed; surprise clearly on his face. "W-Who told you that?"

"Clary."

The black haired boy's face turned stern and he clenched his fists. Jace sensed a lecture coming on, so he slid across the room before that could happen and took Alec by the arm. "Come on."

Unable to form words, Alec fumbled behind him back out of the room and down the hall. Confusion entered his mind but the protests were restrained until they reached the far end of the residential wing where guests stayed. Far from everyone else his apprehension grew and festered in his stomach.

"Jace." He hissed sharply. "Where are we going?"

"Your sister was still awake." Jace murmured. "Don't really want her walking in on us."

The smirk he cast over his shoulder shut up anything else Alec was going to say.

* * *

One of the rooms was open, so Jace pushed his way inside and lead Alec behind him.

It was larger than their rooms-probably meant for multiple people to sleep in-and Alec felt his tiredness rush at him by the sight of the huge bed in the corner; set at the top of a small rounded staircase. His feet took him to it before he could look at much else in the room, though he did hear Jace lock the door, and then his face was pressed into the satin blanket with a sigh of content. One of his knees perched up on it absentmindedly. It had been awhile since they had been allowed to buy sheets as nice as these for themselves-and it had been even longer since he had gotten a decent rest. Maybe he could just lay down for a few minutes…

"Alec."

The blue eyed boy jolted. He had forgotten Jace was with him. He straightened himself so he could peer at his Parabatai over his shoulder but his hands kept on the blanket. "What?"

Jace smiled wickedly and began to undo his shirt. "Don't fall asleep yet.." His voice was silky and low, reminded Alec of what he wanted. His heart bolted at the thought. His feet pattered across the floor dauntingly and he stepped up to the bed to place his hands first on Alec's shoulders-then his elbows, and finally his hands. Alec blushed at their fingers lacing and sighed deeply to relax himself.

Jace pressed his chest close to Alec's back and smiled. "I didn't expect you to go along with this."

"I didn't expect you to suggest it." Alec snorted in response.

The blonde Shadowhunter chuckled. "Fair enough.."

His lips started to move against Alec's shoulder lightly and pressed open mouthed to the nape of his neck once or twice as he reached it. Alec shut his eyes and let the sensation wash over him. Jace was warm, but he knew that he himself probably felt cold in comparison. That was how their personalities were, though. It was expected.

The moon's light came through the bedroom's curtains and Alec realized just how late it was after all. It was the only coherent thing he had been able to piece together for awhile; since Jace had started to run hands up and down his chest under his shirt and then discarding it. Jace's chest was surprisingly chilled and Alec shuddered at the sudden temperature change between them. Jace's own breath hitched in his ear as their skin made contact as his fingers became twisted in the buckles of his jeans and finally got them opened up to slide his hands down Alec's thighs. The black haired boy shifted forward so both his knees were on the bed and Jace followed suit so his were just on the outside of the smaller's. They bent over and Alec let his forehead fall to the bed with a soft moan; his inner thigh being stroked. Jace remained mostly upright, watching the reactions on his Parabatai's face below him and his fingers clutching the bedspread until his knuckles were white.

"Alec."

"What?" Alec's voice was strained breathlessly. It was obvious he was feeling conflicted about this and Jace noticed it.

"Alec." He repeated. "You aren't obligated to do this."

Alec clenched his jaw and shut his eyes with a steady breath. No, he didn't have to. But he knew why he was.

And if Jace was smart for once, he would too.

Jace seemed to take the silence as an answer and with an annoyed grumble he started to touch his partner again. His long fingers wrapped around him and Alec jolted from the shock that reverberated through his body. His nails lightly scratched at him, and his teeth set to making a rough hickey at the base of his neck.

The impatience that radiated off of the blonde Shadowhunter gave Alec butterflies-gave him a hot blush that spread on his pale skin like wildfire. He felt Jace begin to fumble with his own pants and heard them clank (he had no doubt kept his weapons on after all) to the floor.

Jace wasn't one to waste time. This was no exception. Alec wished he could speak, say something-anything-to his friend, but his throat was hoarse and broke his voice when he felt himself closing to tears. Any pain he had felt before could not compare even close to this.

To his heart breaking inside his chest.

When Jace was done Alec collapsed and feigned sleep. His partner ran a hand through his hair and whispered something before dressing and leaving. And Alec knew he should be happy-should be ecstatic. But all he felt was a foreboding unease and unhappiness.

He had what he had thought he wanted, but something felt wrong and it killed him.

Unable to bring himself to stand, he pulled himself further onto the bed and rolled half to his side, with one hand fisting in the back of his hair.

"By the Angel." He whispered. "I can't get much stupider."

* * *

It wasn't much longer before they got the news.

And Alec wasn't sure when they had found out but he and Isabelle learned by witnessing a huge kiss between them. That one moment shook him so hard he vomited on the spot.

So he was right.

Jace was able to rebound quickly, and the same day he and Clary learned Valentine had lied he was kissing her. How long had that been? How long before that day Alec had seen them?

Parabatai were supossed to be closer then brothers. But not this close, and Alec desperately wished he could set his feelings back several steps. Especially now, because he had been hurt more than he had thought Jace would ever hurt him. He shouldn't still be thinking about it and he knew it shouldn't still hurt, but some days it did. On days when he was alone, with his thoughts, he traveled to that night and clutched his chest like that would keep his heart from bursting painfully from his body. Even when Magnus came around-even when they kissed and made hasty promises of "next time"-Alec could recall the words Jace had said to him and it made his gut twist.

Jace never mentioned it. And neither did Alec. They continued as normal, as expected, even while the black haired Shadowhunter felt them slipping apart. He was losing his Brother to someone not of their world, and there was nothing he could do about it.

But he was kind of okay with that. Because Jace was losing him too; to a Warlock set apart from them.


End file.
